Thursday, May 21, 2009

A Reader's Favorite- Shhhh... Silent Sex

One reader asked, "Silent sex: Can it be as big a turn-on when we have to focus on being as silent as possible as it is when we can be as noisy as we want? (whether restraining ourselves vocally or by being so still we don't squeak the bed)"

Is this, can this, be a turn-on for you? One aspect of being silent is truly erotic in my marriage bed. GR and I love to whisper in each others' ears. There is something about having his breath blowing on my ear during sex while he is whispering nasty things to me.... it is hot. The nastier he gets, the more aroused I become. (Hmmm, what does that same about my raunchy mind? ;-) Having silent sex all the time would be dull but occasionally it can add a dimension of eroticism that we might not generally see.

What about you? Is silence ever sexy in your marriage bed?


luvmygirls said...

This is rare for us and, yes, it is exciting. Often it accompanies being at a friend or family members' house. The last time we had to do this we had stopped at a friend's house on our way to youth camp. My bride and I took advantage to keep it quiet, and really enjoyed it. And even when we don't HAVE to be quiet, it's nice to play that way. I LOVE to whisper in my bride's ear during LM, and I love the return! Good post, Gemma!

job29man said...

I'll comment on the "hot talk" part.

When I'm holding DW in a "conubial embrace" (i.e. poking her) there and she starts talking "hot" to me whispering in my ear! Wow! Fireworks.

I've noticed that she sometimes does this when she wants me to "finish", like if she is getting sore or if I'm taking a very long time to finish.

It's almost like clockwork that when the "hot talk" begins we could just about begin a 2 minute countdown to conclusion.

I wonder how many Christian wives know how to talk this way? It is a TOTAL out-of-character thing for Sarah, and probably for 98% of believing wives too.

But I highly recommend learning this skill!

Gemma said...

Job, it might be out of character for us to talk that way outside the bedroom but in the bedroom, it should be as normal as breathing, don't you think? And guys, it is equally as erotic for us dw's to hear that "hot talk" whispered in our ears during sex. When GR starts it, between his choice of words and feeling his breath on my ears... it puts me over the roof.

job29man said...

Yes Gemma, I agree that "hot talk" should be a totally guilt-free experience for a husband or wife to do.

..... hmmm... maybe this is worth a separate topic?

Gemma said...

May be, Job! I'll add it to my "reader's favorite" list.

bunnyhunch said...

When I think of silent sex, I think of the times we tried hard to be absolutely silent so no one else in the house knew what was going on in our room. That usually meant being still enough so the bed didn't bounce or squeak (there is no insulation in the ceiling in the family room below us, so not much of a barrier). It also meant being careful not to moan when things got intense or scream when I O'd. It was a fun challenge, and DH always paid close attention, covering my mouth in the most immediate and convenient way possible. (It has been nice not to worry about it lately; our kids are all on their own now.)

The comments here have shed new light on what it means to be silent during lovemaking. I had not thought about how whispering, and we hadn't done much of it in bed until recently. DH had always been completely silent during sex. In the past few weeks, he's become bolder, though, meeting my new boldness equally. He has started whispering in my ear and I love it. I do it for him, too, now that I have seen how much it turns him on.

Funny how a discussion on silent sex has us being more vocal. :)

Gemma said...

bunnyhunch said: "Funny how a discussion on silent sex has us being more vocal."

Don't try to understand it. Just enjoy!