Friday, February 29, 2008

Horny and waiting for reunion

I'm waiting for GR to arrive home from a short business trip. Can't wait to get to some business of our own, bedroom business. That's all for now.

Gemma, GR's whore

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Time for sex w/no desire vs. no time, huge desire. Which is worse?

It would be our own fault if we had time for sex but didn't take time to enjoy it. It's a whole 'nuther ballgame when we don't have time for sex when we badly want need it.

Such was our situation this morning. Up too late last night assisting dc2 with homework. GR and I both wiped out this morning and didn't wake until 45 minutes before needing to leave the house.... leaving us barely time to dress, eat and run. Darn! The only thing good comes of that is knowing that tonight or tomorrow morning's sex will be more intense than usual.

This makes me think-- For the last 14 months we've averaged having sex 7-12 times a week. Prior to that, I refused sex for 26 years. At our current rate, how many times did GR and I miss having sex within those 26 years?

Hands over ears (or eyes) to avoid finding out.... don't tell me. OK, yes, I really DO want to know.... not really.... but kind of sort of. It will be so depressing. I guess I need to know and then I want to move ahead and not dwell on all those missed opportunities.

For GR and me, "no time, huge desire" is better than "time, no desire". At least we can go through the day horny and longing for each other and know that very soon our bodies will be as one.

A couple of poems I read this morning express what's in my heart right now:

As if to lift my babe- in-arms,
my brazen lover touched my breast
with just a fingertip.
-Bihari (1595-1664)

Half-sleeping,
my body pulls towards yours---
desire a long oar dipping
again and again
in this night's dark rain.
-Jane Hirshfield

Gemma, GR's whore

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

They ARE Getting Along

Last night, "Eroticism" was at an all time high while we sexually enjoyed each other before falling asleep in each others' arms. What a pleasant surprise this morning to find both of us waking up horny again. This is as it should be.... our passion for one another overflowing from night, to morning, to next night, and so on.... I guess "Emotional Disconnect" and "Eroticism" ARE getting along while we finish sorting through the disconnect.

I wonder how many others succeed in enjoying their marriage bed when communication needs repair? Is that a "guy thing" to be able to compartmentalize each aspect of the relationship? Maybe that's why I have to work at it so hard.

Gemma, GR's whore

Monday, February 25, 2008

"Emotional Disconnect", meet "Eroticism" and the two of you had better get along.

Recently GR and I had a larger-than-usual, emotional disconnect. Darn--- It did have a negative impact on our sex for a few days leaving us in a slightly horny state. To enjoy sex again I had to break through my emotional barrier, although we're still working on the disconnect. Before my awakening this would have been a good excuse for me to sexually shut down but this time, it was so liberating to push past the disconnect and enjoy sex in spite of things.

Intimacy--- The spiritual, emotional and physical are so entwined that when one of them disconnects, leaving a lack, we have to push through in the other areas before they all end up lacking. I'm sorry, sex is way too hot to ignore even when the emotions are raw. I've found that when I "just do it (the sex)" during those times, we can experience an eroticism that takes us over the top.

Does sex help us with our emotions? Does it help us see our relationship more clearly? For me, I think it does and I know it does for GR. Why are we often tempted to shut off the sex faucet when the emotions are raw? I mean if it helped to turn our backs on sex I'd understand but it doesn't. If we slow down or stop sex, the emotional disconnect becomes huge.

I truly wonder what it is that quickly helps most dh's reconnect emotionally with their dw's so that the sex doesn't have to become disabled? How do dh's go through the progression of thoughts when this happens? Even during a temporary emotional disconnect, in what ways do dh's keep eroticism in the marriage when the disconnect rears its ugly head?

Often, I think of these things as being people where I want to introduce them by saying, "Emotional Disconnect", meet "Eroticism". Would the two of you please get along so I can still enjoy sex?"

Gemma, GR's whore

Saturday, February 23, 2008

How "Passion Within Marriage" Began

A year ago I stumbled onto a way of bringing hot passion into my marriage, which had been slowly going downhill. You see, for over 25 years I was a "refusing wife" to my husband GR (Gemma's Ravisher). At best, he and I engaged in passionless sex every few months but things were usually at their worse with sex happening as seldom as every few years. That was our miserable existence until I experienced a sexual awakening, at which time everything changed.

In December 2006 my spirit, mind and body experienced a sexual awakening. Since then, GR and I have both been high-sex drive with our frequency for quality sex at an average of 7-12 times a week. Our current quality and quantity of passionate sex is essential for our marriage so we make it a high priority in our lives.

My purpose for blogging is in hopes that other married individuals might benefit from my story and/or from discussing these topics. Or perhaps my blog will simply be a "good read" for someone. At the very least, I would enjoy discussing sexual passion with readers.

To all husbands or wives who earnestly seek or already enjoy passionate sex in their marriage, please come chat with me often. Thank you for visiting "Passion Within Marriage".